May Your Spirit Live on Forever

On June 10th, one of the most precious people in my life was called home to be with God. She was 20 years old and a gift to this world. This is the speech I read at the luncheon following her funeral. With each passing day, it does not get easier, but a little harder because I miss her more. However, with each passing day --- I know I am one day closer to meeting her again in Heaven. I love you, Thing 2.

Today I know there wasn’t a dry eye in the place. Tomorrow, our tears will still be falling. In fact, ever since we received the news, we’ve been living with bags under our eyes. Let me tell you that it’s perfectly okay to cry because all our hearts are broken. All of us are mourning. All of us just had someone who we never ever wanted to let go of taken away far too soon. Cry as many tears as you need to. Don’t ever be afraid to admit this sucks. You hate it. It’s not fair. Don’t feel bad asking Lauren why she had to leave. Don’t hesitate to ask God either. Everyone will tell you, “It’s going to be okay.” It’s okay for you to think it won’t. You can yell, you can be angry. Or you can be silent. And that’s okay, too.

But please do not cry FOR Lauren. She’s up in Heaven smiling down, laughing with all her new friends she made within the first 5 minutes she was there, and wishing everyone down here would just stop crying (and looking at her) already. But you can go ahead and cry for yourself—we’re the ones who must go on without her beautiful smiles, her obnoxious laughs, her cheesy jokes, and her comforting hugs. Those are the things that must live on in our memories.

I begged Lauren for some inspiration to say exactly what I needed to say to heal your hearts today. I prayed God would give me the words that would somehow leave us all feeling just a little bit better. Well, Lauren left it up to me this time – she doesn’t like crowds or people talking about her so she decided she’d just avoid it all together. I just hope I can say one thing that might put a stamp on your heart so that a day will never go by that you don’t think of Lauren and smile. Lauren, I hope this is good enough for you. If it isn’t, I’m sure you’ll tell me about it. And because I’m sure you don’t want to listen to me go on forever, I just want to tell you the top 10 things I believe Lauren would want us all to do to keep her spirit alive forever.

10) Love your furry friends. Whether big or small, treat them as if they are the most special thing in your world. If you find a critter along the road, bring it home. If it’s a dog, awesome. If it’s a deer, even better. As we drove home last night, a baby deer ran across the road. I could just hear Lauren begging us to stop, pull the car over, and take it home. And if we said, “No”-- well we’d eventually get tired of listening to her whine and we’d go searching for it.

9) Always use correct grammar and don’t abbreviate even if it’s on Facebook or in a text. Lauren HATED it when correct punctuation wasn’t used. Don’t use the word pardon –no word disturbed her more. And the word “yay” is the world’s most overused word according to her. Go back – read some messages from her. You’ll understand what I mean. Sorry, Lauren, because I did not proofread this.

8) If you think a boy is cute, tell him. Right to his face. Don’t be shy about it. Don’t even think twice about it. If you think you might want to marry him, tell him that too. Flirt a little...sometimes flirt a lot. Make an absolute fool out of yourself even if you’d never stand a chance with him. If it gets you $20, at least pretend he’s cute. But make sure that his last name looks good in cursive, or don’t even waste your time.

7) Talk to every person you meet. You don’t have to hang out with them or even like them really, but learn something about them. Every time Lauren met anyone, she instantly started talking to them, laughing with them, and finding out something unique about them. She wasn’t afraid to approach strangers, and she sure met some interesting people. Whether you’re sitting here today and have known her for a few days, months, or several years---we all feel the same about her. She had that effect on people. You only needed to know her for about 5 minutes before she began to brighten your life. But don’t think you were just another friend. She made time for each and every one of us. If it was a quick text, a long phone call, or a weekend visit—she always kept in touch.

6) Never grow up. Play with Barbies. Play with them in public. Color. Doodle. Drink from a sippy cup. Lie out in the middle of the driveway and stare at the stars. Sit around a campfire with your friends. Stay out late. Stay up all night just talking. Get excited about the little things. Act crazy. Be a dork. Whatever you do, don’t ever grow up.

5) Don’t be afraid to bend the rules on occasion. I’m not telling you to break the law (I was always the goody-goody in this friendship), but it’s okay to step out of your comfort zone. In fact, make sure you take a good friend with you. Lauren had a way of dragging us innocent people into her adventures. You never know what kind of fun you might find when you think outside the box. Try (almost everything) at least once. This is how you live life to the fullest – just like Lauren did.

4) Be indecisive. Be picky. Change your outfit 10 times before walking out the door. Cut your hair and then put in hair extensions. Go to school for one thing and decide you want to do something completely different with your life. Call your closest friends over any major event in your life just to get their take on the situation, but then just do whatever you wanted to do in the first place. If something isn’t what you wanted or how you wanted it, it’s okay to “occasionally” overreact. But definitely don’t ever let anyone tell you “No.”

3) Be a freak when it comes to food. Eat cheese on your spaghetti. Eat your spaghetti cold. Put peas in your shells and cheese. Put peas in everything. Go to Subway and order a sandwich without any meat. Drink an entire carton of orange juice straight from the carton. Make a cheese quesadilla for every meal. Brag to everyone on facebook about how good you are at making cheese quesadillas. Get two pans out to make two boxes of macaroni & cheese. And please, make sure you ALWAYS preheat the oven.

2) I’ve said many, many times that you can’t possibly describe Lauren in words. But I’ve always remembered the way she once described herself because it was perfect. “I’m a passionate person. I either love something or I hate it, but I’m passionate about loving it. And I’m also passionate about hating it.” Say what’s on your mind and don’t be afraid of what anyone thinks. Yeah, you might offend a few people or just get laughed at, but say it anyway. I’m not going to say Lauren always needed to speak her mind, or that she always said the most intelligent thing, but she said what she thought and she was always honest. There are very few of us that can say we’d do the same. Be true to who you are, what you think, and how you feel. Be passionate.

1) Live every single day as if it were your last. You hear it all the time, but Lauren actually did it. Last Thursday, Lauren was in great spirits but that should not shock anyone. She lived every day to its fullest. And she never left you wondering how she felt about you. No matter if you talked for 2 minutes or an hour, she always made sure to say, “I love you.” She always made you feel good about yourself. So tell your friends you love them. Tell your parents you love them. Tell your siblings, too. Tell them daily. Hug them. Make time for them. Be that ray of sunshine in their life.

We all thought this was a nightmare. Many of us still do. Not our Lauren...Not THE Lauren Anderson. Not the fun loving, full of spirit, one of a kind Lauren. She was so young and full of dreams, but God called her home and we have to believe He had a different plan for her. So we woke up the next day, and we had to face reality. Time will pass and we’ll have to go back to our jobs, school, and our daily lives. Although right now we can’t see ever going on without Lauren by our side, we must. And she wouldn’t want it any other way. If you live your life just like she did – every day to the fullest and full of smiles and laughter...you WILL get through. And you’ve got one pretty cute, sometimes ditzy, angel up there watching over you. And unless you need help on a math test, she’ll be there in an instant. But she’s WAY too pretty to do math.

Lauren, may your spirit live on forever in all of the lives you have touched…oh, the many lives you have touched. I leave you with this quote from Abraham Lincoln that says it all. “In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” We love you, toots.